Finding balance in overwhelm
Claire Renée Thomas, founder of Reaching My Best, is a mindset and mindfulness coach, and one of the few certified mental fitness coaches in the UK. With a passion and focus on guiding and empowering women to unlock their full potential and overcome any obstacles they may be facing personally or professionally I was delighted when she said yes to being in YOMU.
Claire’s mission isn’t just to guide individuals to greater fulfillment, but to empower them to lead rewarding, purpose-driven lives and I hope you love what she’s shared, as much as I do……..
We all experience overwhelm at some point in our lives, but the secret to finding balance after overwhelm is to recognise the signs and respond to them as quickly as you can.
Here are some signs to look out for that may indicate you’re overwhelmed:
You’ve got so much to do, but don’t seem to be accomplishing anything
One of the key signs of overwhelm is an inability to get anything done despite the mountains of items on your to-do list. Procrastination can be immensely frustrating because we know something needs to get done, but we are paralysed by inaction
You react disproportionately badly when things go wrong
When life feels easy and is going “our way”, we interpret “bad” events differently, to when we are overwhelmed. A seemingly insignificant event can trigger a chain reaction of negative response. For example, spilling your tea as you walk to your desk may cause you to shrug and head for a cleaning cloth if things are going well. Conversely in overwhelm the same tea spilling may have us swearing and heading into our next interaction with impatience and negativity.
You no longer find the joy in activities that you used to love
A sure sign that we are overwhelmed is when the activities that used to bring us joy and escapism fall away in favour of the mundane tasks we feel we “have to” do. Our fight or flight stress response has us believe that we need to focus on the activities that our mind thinks are a priority. Any activity that comes from a place of love or self-worth our minds see as an unnecessary luxury.
You’re declining social invitations
Having a constant feeling of overwhelm is mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausting. So, we shut ourselves away from the world, not wanting to be a burden or drain on others. We can feel shame in our overwhelm, believing that we should be able to do everything that life throws at us. This exhaustion and shame have us lying on the sofa binge-watching or doom-scrolling on our mobiles.
You’re constantly tired or getting ill
If you’re not getting enough quality sleep, waking up tired, constantly getting ill or taking ages to fight off a cold these can be signs that you are overwhelmed. Our bodies are incredible communication mechanisms if we give ourselves the space to listen to them. At some point, mental overwhelm will manifest itself in our bodies one way or another.
To re-balance our lives after a period of overwhelm there are many courses of action that we can take.
If you feel you are procrastinating, take a moment to stop and re-centre. This could be a few deep breaths, a tea break, or a walk outside. When you can feel that you are more grounded ask yourself why you might be procrastinating. What’s the real reason for it? Take some time to uncover the answer because in it lies your unique path to balance.
Mindfulness is a great way to practice having an awareness of our response to situations that happen around us. The more we practice ,the more skilled we get at appreciating that things happen, and we don’t need to label them as good or bad. They just are. This is an incredibly liberating place to be.
Reconnect with the activities and people that you love. Make it manageable and in a way that feels easy. Go for a 5-minute sketch or a quick bake, rather than an artistic masterpiece or a Bake-Off Showcase piece! Ring a friend or arrange a walk with them rather than planning a late night out. Be honest with yourself and your friends and only do what feels right and easy.
Finally, the key to finding the right balance is having a solid foundation to work from so that you have the resilience to negotiate life. Protect your sleep, eat a balanced diet, and pick an exercise regime that works for you. Remember to make it yours. Listen to your intuition and you’ll know when you’ve struck the right balance.
It’s important to note that learning to implement these strategies and approaches is a life skill that takes practice. Be patient. Listen to yourself and your body and above all be kind and find self-compassion.
You can find out more about Claire Renée Thomas, Mindset and Mindfulness Coach, at Reaching My Best
